Cinderella… Is That You?

Cute curly little girl playing Cinderella fairy tale holding a magic wand next to a pumpkin carriage having fun in an autumn park at Halloween

Are you living the life of Cinderella… before the ball?

Huh?

Okay… I’ll explain. Before the ball, Cinderella never said NO. Always did what she was told or what was expected of her. She dreamed that her life could be different… but never really did anything to change it. She actually was the heiress to her father’s estate and yet she lived as a servant and a pauper. She really didn’t believe in herself… she was stuck in the old… I’m Not Enough Syndrome.

Essentially, Cinderella was a people pleaser… just like I was… and just like many of you are. The only difference is… she had a fairy godmother.

But interestingly enough, her fairy godmother did nothing to change Cinderella. She only changed her beliefs about herself. For the first time, Cinderella believed she was a true princess and she became the part… she became ENOUGH in her own mind. Which was wonderful… until the clock struck twelve… and it all went away… Cinderella and her newfound beliefs all became proverbial pumpkins.

Of course you know the end of the story… Cinderella left a glass slipper at the ball and the Prince used it to search for her… somehow he knew that only his princess would have a foot tiny enough for it to fit… and Cinderella had just enough moxie left to step up and produce the other shoe after her ugly stepsister broke the one the prince brought along.

And… they lived happily ever after.

So let me tell you what’s going on if you are living the life of pre-ball Cinderella. It’s not what you are doing for other people that is getting to you… it’s your underlying, subconscious beliefs that are causing the problems. And… specifically it’s the anger, fear, frustration, guilt, despair and a host of other unpleasant emotions which those beliefs trigger to keep you behaving in a way to protect yourself.

Jane

Oh… I forgot to mention… you can change your life… without a fairy godmother or a magic wand… and that’s the real magic! CLICK HERE to request a complimentary magic-wand session with Bertha and me.

Today’s Philosophy…

IMG_6039-2 copyRecently… I was privileged to spend some time with my cousin’s husband… although they have been married almost forty years… they have never lived here… and we haven’t had the opportunity to really get to know each other… and… by most accounts… we would be unlikely friends… as at first glance we have little in common…

He was German born and educated… and well educated at that… he is a very successful business man… and has traveled all over the world… and is very cosmopolitan… in contrast to me… who well… let’s just say… I’m much more laid back in most areas of my life…

But the funny thing was… we started a conversation… regarding… entitlement… and as we began to share our views… his from philosophers of old… and mine… from… Berthaand my Alabama perspective… they were actually… spot on the same… and so we expanded the conversation… to more philosophies… and although our words were different… we continued to have such similar values and beliefs… that I have to say… it was one of the most enjoyable afternoons I’ve had in a long time…

It would have been easy… to assume that I had nothing to add to a conversation with him… it would have been easy… to listen with a closed heart… and smile politely… but instead… I chose… to open my heart… to be vulnerable… to express how I felt and what I believed… and to listen to how his beliefs paralleled mine… and question where they didn’t… and be willing to come to a new conclusion…

Of course… Bertha… was pleased with me… for being open and vulnerable… but she also suggested… that perhaps… like with my cousin… I have more in common with others… who appear different… if I would just be open and vulnerable… willing to listen and share… and see where their beliefs actually parallel mine… and question where they don’t… and be willing to come to a new conclusion…

Then… she said… she hoped you would do it, too… and… we could watch together… as the world changed…

Jane