At the Rock…

My thoughts are popping like corn this morning…darting from here to there…and never quite settling on one thing to write about…should it be the crazy dream I had last night…the trip to my daughter’s last weekend…the fact that the flamingo did a nose dive in the yard…or…several other things that are floating through…

But…none of them seem just right…although…I do have pictures of the flamingo…and…some funny theories as to why it was pounding its head against a rock…it just doesn’t seem like what…needs…to come out this morning…

No…it’s deeper than that…I need to work through…my frustration…

For the past several months…I’ve been on a quite restricted dietary regime…not for weight loss…but…to correct some metabolic issues…that poor diet and lifestyle choices over the years…created…

And…it’s been…okay…I say…it’s not really…hard…it’s more…inconvenient

So…it was with hope…for some leniency…that I went for a recheck last week…maybe…yogurt…and…eggs…a couple of times a month…

Instead…I got…you’re doing good…keep it up until at least January…then…we’ll see

Okay…I have to admit it…I’ve been grumpy…I’ve been withdrawn…I’ve been in a funk…ever since…I’m tired of it…

I’m tired of being…different…based on what I cannot eat…I want to feel…normal…again…

Bertha…reminds me…I’ve never been…normal…I’ve always marched to my own drum…no point in trying to fit in now…

She goes on to tell me…it’s not the food that’s bothering me…it’s the feelings that I have associated with the food over the years…the self-nurturing that I have done…with food…most of which…is not on my list anymore…

Who is she kidding…none of my nurturing foods are on my list…and…somehow…broccoli and grilled chicken…just aren’t that soothing…

Thankfully…she said…that I don’t have to rely on food for nurturing…that I have so many…ways to do that…spending time in nature…meditation…contemplation…reading good books…exercise…spending time with people I love…writing…cooking…and…the list goes on and on…

Hmmm…she’s right…all of those things do nurture me…but there are times…when…only ice cream…would do the trick…

And…that’s when she joined the flamingo…at the rock…

Jane

KISS Me Quick…

Recently…I’ve been…cleaning out…the garage…the cabinets…the closet…whilst I was sorting…and deciding how to best store what remained…Bertha…strolled by long enough to remind me…of a principle that I read several years ago…in the book…Organizing From the Inside Out…by…Julie Morgenstern…

Essentially…it said…that it didn’t matter how fancy or expensive your organization system is…if it isn’t convenient…you won’t use it…

The wisdom of that statement…has proven itself to me time and time again…as I have moved at least three times since reading it…now…I try to look at each item…and consider its use…how often I use it…and how convenient it needs to be…obviously…the coffee maker…wouldn’t get returned to the garage on a daily basis…and…sits on the counter…the pancake griddle…on the other hand…can be stored in the cabinet…and brought out on special occasions…before relegating it to a new home…

I also set my office up at work…using the same principle…how convenient will it be to file a document…do I have to get up and walk across the room…or…can I just swivel in my chair…

I took the reminder…and continued sorting and storing…thinking…that was that…but…we’re talking…Bertha…so…of course…she said it reminded her of my life…

Huh…

First…she brought up…exercise…it doesn’t matter how expensive the gym membership…or…the sports equipment…if it’s not convenient…I’m not going to do it…

Hmmm…

Then…she continued with…diet…again…it doesn’t matter how incredible the plan is…if it isn’t convenient…I won’t stick with it…

Hmmm…

Lastly…she mentioned…spiritual practice…again…reminding me…that if I make it too complicated…have to be in a certain chair…at a certain moment…after fasting…or…whatever limitations I might put on it…I won’t do it…

Hmmm…

And…she’s right of course…I have found all of those things to be true as well…now…I wonder…how will I store this…wisdom…so that I can easily retrieve it…

Jane