Coming Unbound…

This summer…I’m learning balance…not by walking a tightrope…although…it does feel like it at times…no…I am learning to balance…boundaries…with…openness…

Quite frankly…walking a tightrope might be easier…

To say my relationship boundaries were…broachable…in the past…isn’t quite true…they were more…nonexistent…I would kind of just…blend…into the personality…of the person I was with…saying…it doesn’t matter…whatever you want to do…a lot…

And…the truth of the matter is…I really didn’t care…didn’t know what…I…wanted…but…I wasn’t happy…

Then…I spent several years alone…and…I began to do the work…to discover…with…Bertha’s…help…of course…what I do want…how I like to keep my house…how I like to eat…what kind of schedule I like to keep…where I like to go…all those kinds of things…

And…although…Bertha…did mention that I was getting a little set in my ways…I was really happy with all my boundaries…

Until…he…showed up…and…the real work began…

How…to keep my boundaries…my essence…and…still be open…to another person…and…allow…him to maintain his…

It’s tricky…at best…but…Bertha…says…it’s really simple…that…although I’ve spent a great deal of time…figuring out…exactly what I like and want…that doesn’t mean…those things are set in stone…no…rather…they are starting points…to help me decide…what is truly important in my life…to help me make choices…to make compromises…to stay open…to the fullness of life…because…as she says…

A full life…can’t be contained in a rigid boundary…it always…overflows…

Jane

We Have an Opening…

This morning…Bertha…reminds me that…in order to be…open…to the future…I have to…continually…let go…of the past…

She goes on to say…letting go…is not the same thing…as…forgetting…I can remember…savor…the past…I just have to…let go…of the…expectation…that it will continue in the present…

As I contemplate it…I realize that it is true…for all areas of my life…from raising my children…to moving from one town to another…to relationships…

And…the list could go on and on…

But…today…it feels appropriate for work…where…suddenly…I have become…one of the…veterans…in a field of new…soldiers

Bertha…says my mission…should I choose to accept it…and…no…I don’t have a choice…is…to continue to savor…the camaraderie I shared with my friends over the years…while…being open to new friends…and…new ways of doing things…

Hmmm…

Definitely a challenge…but…by no means…impossible

Jane