Desperate Vampires…

Yesterday…I know…I always seem to start out that way…but…honestly…I write early in the morning…nothing has happened yet…unless…teeth brushing and bed making…are worthy of blogs…well…probably not…so…I’ll stick with…

Yesterday…I was appreciating how nice the kitchen looked…as…I was making lunch…then…my thoughts wandered over to the…futileness…of cleaning the kitchen…it seems that no matter how often I clean it…someone’s always eating something and messing it right back up…unfortunately…I live alone…so…you can probably figure out…who that someone is…yep…the same someone who has to clean it up again…

Anyway…those thoughts…soon…had me contemplating other seemingly futile tasks…laundry…quickly came to mind…now…to me…laundry is on the top of the list…of those…never really get them done…chores…I mean…really…no matter how much I stuff into the machine…I’ve always got something on…that’s essentially…dirty…

Well…you might anticipate where my thoughts went next…I could do the laundry in the nude…that would solve that problem…I’ve heard of women who do that…thankfully…I’ve never visited any of them…on…wash day…but…I have heard of them…

Now…after more contemplation…I figure…in order to join them in getting all my laundry done at the same time…I would first have to meet up with Barnabas Collins…for a little neck chomping session…

Why…you might ask…elementary…my dear Watson…vampires…can’t see themselves…in every mirror they walk by…hmmm…now that I think about it…I might like being a vamp…who knows…

Jane

PS…and…thank you…Bertha…for challenging me to join the twenty-first century…and write about…vampires…I told you I could do it…well…okay…I did it…kinda…sorta…but…I was close…hey…that counts…doesn’t it…

Bertha…says…this isn’t horseshoes…geez…

The Tdap Shot…Heard ‘Round the World…

I wrote about…keeping up…with my medical information the other day…which…made me remember…getting my last…actually my first…Tdap…vaccination…I say first…because…the adult vaccine was changed a few years ago…from…TD…tetanus/diptheria…to…Tdap…tetanus/diphtheria/pertussis

Anyway…to make an long story…even longer…seems there has been an increase in…pertussis…whooping cough…in recent years…so…all us school nurses got an email…recommending that we get the new vaccine…

I’m pretty diligent about that kind of thing…so…I rolled up my sleeve the same afternoon…and thought that would be that…well…my arm was a bit sore…but…I expected that…

What I didn’t expect…was to discover…a fairly…large…tender…lymph node…hiding behind my left collarbone…but…on Sunday afternoon…when…all the doctor’s offices were closed…I did…

I must admit…it scared me half to death…so…I did what I had to do…I Googled…yeah…I know…you saw that one coming…you know me so well…anyway…what I found scared me even more…lymphoma…that’s what all the sites said…would cause supraclavicular lymphadenopathy

At some point…just before I Googled lymphoma treatments…I remembered…the Tdap shot…could it be connected…yes…I Googled that…and…somewhere…in tiny print…at the very end…of an obscure site…I found what I was looking for…yes…Tdap…could cause that big honking lymph node…if the injection was in the ipsilateral appendage

I have to tell you the truth…I’ve been a nurse for a lot of years…and I didn’t have a clue…so…I Googled…one last time…it meant…same side…and…yes…my injection…was in the left arm…I breathed again…

But…I still called…and made an appointment with my OB-GYN doctor the next day…just to be safe…he agreed…all was well…but…since I was there…he might as well…do my yearly stuff…including…sending me for a mammogram…

I went…and…thought…that was that…

Until…the hospital called me…there was a lump…could I come back for an ultrasound…now…as frightening as this sounds…I was at least 95% certain…that it was the same lump…that…I’ve had for years…that had been biopsied…and was fine…so…I only fretted…I didn’t panic…

But…I did have to take off a second day from work…and go for the ultrasound…but…they couldn’t find my old films…so…they weren’t sure if it was the same spot or not…

A couple of hours…and…lots of frustration later…we found films in the doctor’s office…that verified the spot…it hadn’t changed…once again…all was well…

So…let’s recap…no…let’s not…it was too much the first time…but…all of this…happened…as a result…of one little Tdap shot…

Bertha…says it is a lot like life…of course she would…she says…my biggest messes…usually start…with…a small event…and then snowball…into a fiasco…and…she’s right…they do…I always say…I get into the most trouble…when…I’m minding my own business…

Well…she did say something else…about my tendency to…make mountains out of mole hills…and…that if I didn’t settle down…she was gonna take away my Google privileges…but…she couldn’t be serious about that…could she…

No…surely not…so…for now…I’m just glad that I’m not due for another Tdap…for seven more years…I hope I remember about the lymph node by then…just saying…

Jane