At the Rock…

My thoughts are popping like corn this morning…darting from here to there…and never quite settling on one thing to write about…should it be the crazy dream I had last night…the trip to my daughter’s last weekend…the fact that the flamingo did a nose dive in the yard…or…several other things that are floating through…

But…none of them seem just right…although…I do have pictures of the flamingo…and…some funny theories as to why it was pounding its head against a rock…it just doesn’t seem like what…needs…to come out this morning…

No…it’s deeper than that…I need to work through…my frustration…

For the past several months…I’ve been on a quite restricted dietary regime…not for weight loss…but…to correct some metabolic issues…that poor diet and lifestyle choices over the years…created…

And…it’s been…okay…I say…it’s not really…hard…it’s more…inconvenient

So…it was with hope…for some leniency…that I went for a recheck last week…maybe…yogurt…and…eggs…a couple of times a month…

Instead…I got…you’re doing good…keep it up until at least January…then…we’ll see

Okay…I have to admit it…I’ve been grumpy…I’ve been withdrawn…I’ve been in a funk…ever since…I’m tired of it…

I’m tired of being…different…based on what I cannot eat…I want to feel…normal…again…

Bertha…reminds me…I’ve never been…normal…I’ve always marched to my own drum…no point in trying to fit in now…

She goes on to tell me…it’s not the food that’s bothering me…it’s the feelings that I have associated with the food over the years…the self-nurturing that I have done…with food…most of which…is not on my list anymore…

Who is she kidding…none of my nurturing foods are on my list…and…somehow…broccoli and grilled chicken…just aren’t that soothing…

Thankfully…she said…that I don’t have to rely on food for nurturing…that I have so many…ways to do that…spending time in nature…meditation…contemplation…reading good books…exercise…spending time with people I love…writing…cooking…and…the list goes on and on…

Hmmm…she’s right…all of those things do nurture me…but there are times…when…only ice cream…would do the trick…

And…that’s when she joined the flamingo…at the rock…

Jane

Like a Lazy Tomato…

Yesterday morning…I went outside…to find all three of my tomatoes…lying on the ground…more or less…they’re in big pots…so…essentially…they were hanging over the edges…giving the appearance of having gone to sleep for the night…but…not getting up with the sun…

Now…I knew that they would need to be staked at some point…but…they were really little when I left for the beach…only to have a growth spurt…whilst I was away…

They were emergently staked…one with a flamingo leg…well…a girl has to do what a girl has to do…permanent stakes were purchased…to be fully installed today…including a twining cord for extra support…

And…I thought…that was that…

Bertha…came strolling by…thankfully not noticing that I had defiled a flamingo…remarking that it reminded her of my life…

What…how can lazy tomatoes remind her of my life…well…the obvious comes to mind…but…thankfully…that wasn’t her intention…

No…not at all…

She quickly explained…that just like the tomatoes…I need added support during times of rapid growth…even though…growth is positive…it is still change…and it’s not the time to let my sustaining practices slide…just because I’m feeling good…

Hmmm…she’s right of course…I have had the tendency to do just that…so…this morning…I wonder…should I go…back to the store…and get some stakes for my life…or…well…maybe I could use the other flamingo leg…or…maybe some time in the contemplation chair to sort all that out…

Jane