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As healthy as it is pretty!

As we were planning holiday menus…my daughter mentioned that she didn’t know what I could eat…or something like that…I think…Bertha…answered her…because…the response didn’t sound like…me

I can eat anything I want…but…I choose to eat…low fat…low carb…healthy

I didn’t think much about it at the time…but…I’ve caught myself saying it at other times…even to myself…when I chose not to eat biscuits at Mama’s last week…when I walk by the bakery at the grocery store…when I chose to carry the same lunch every day for the first five months of school…because it was easy and it worked…

I see that there have been a lot of choices involved…

Now that people have started noticing the weight loss…and are asking about it…I feel compelled to say…I’ve worked hard at it…but…Bertha…won’t let those words come out…replacing them with…I’ve been diligent about it…which is true…I have…I have carried my own food to my sisters’ houses for dinner…when their menu didn’t fit my needs…I’ve planned…I’ve been creative…I’ve made my food as attractive as possible…I’ve created mantras to get me through…but…none of it was hard…not really…

So…I had to ask…Bertha…why is it diligent instead of hard…she replied that the difference is the absence of depravation…that if I felt deprived…it would be hard…

She went on to say…that the reason I don’t feel deprived…is because I realize…this is my choice…I am choosing to lose weight…I am choosing to eat this way…no one…no upcoming event…is spurring me on…it’s my choice…I’m doing it for me…

I remember declining Thanksgiving dressing…eating broccoli and Brussels sprouts with my turkey instead…and…not feeling the least bit cheated…I knew I could take the day off…and eat it if I wanted…I knew it was a choice…not a rule…but…I didn’t want to…I wanted follow my plan…

Bertha…says that depravation stems from the sense…that someone…or something…outside of me…is controlling my life…and…that it’s the same with money…

Hmmm…something to contemplate…

Jane