As many of you know…Bertha…has a thing about…living my truth…whatever that may be…and…most of the time…I’m okay with it…but…there are times…when it’s just plain difficult to do…
Oh…I can know what the truth is…I can accept it…it’s just when it comes to communicating it…that I have a bit of trouble…
That trouble coming from being the proverbial people pleaser…and…never wanting to hurt someone else’s feelings…or even disappoint them…which makes it very difficult to say…
No…
In fact…I think that’s how I got married the second time…but…I digress…and that’s a story best left untold…
It happened recently…when someone wanted more from me…than I was willing to give…so…what did I do…I took the soft approach…I made excuses…I thought they were thinly veiled…I thought they would see through them…to the…truth…
They didn’t…
They continued to insist…I continued to resist…this time using my second favorite soft approach…avoidance…or…ignoring…which when I was gonna type it in that tense…came out…ignorance…which…Bertha…said was an apt description…
Because…you guessed it…they didn’t let up…what…you must not have heard me…because you aren’t responding…
Until…Bertha…kind of rattled my cage…and asked…are you gonna live your truth…or are you just gonna tell other people to…
Ouch…
It seems that unlike me…Bertha…doesn’t have a problem being a straight shooter…
Of course she was right…and…I put on my big girl panties…and…just said…no…
The ironic thing is…I think it was more hurtful at that point…than if I’d just said it originally…spared…the insistence…the resistance…the ignorance…
Jane
I recently had to say ‘no’ to a friend who wanted help with a book. I just didn’t have the time and my own work would have suffered. It IS difficult. I am proud of you for saying no in the end as you put yourself first xx
And…I’m proud of you, too! I think saying no is the first step to genuine self-care. Glad you were able to take care of yourself!