Ghostly Gifts…

This morning…Bertha…is whispering…forgiveness…and…honestly…I didn’tJane Carroll realize I was angry with anyone…but…she says that forgiveness isn’t only about…anger

Rather…she says…it’s more about…releasing my expectations…that something should have been different…

She says…it’s about letting go of my need to be…right…and that doesn’t just mean in an argument…no…not at all…it has to do with me thinking I have things figured out…only to have them turn out totally different than I had planned…

Hmmm…some things from my past start floating by…like Halloween ghosts on parade…and I realize that even though…I’m not angry…at least not anymore…I haven’t fully let them go either…I still get a little sting each time I remember them…

So…how do I do this…

Bertha…says to look for and appreciate the gift that each situation brought into my life…and that once I appreciate the gift…I can let go of the event itself…then I won’t feel the sting…because…all is forgiven…

Hmmm…looks like I may be getting lots of…gifts…today…who knew…

Jane

What If…

A few mornings ago…I was…complaining…about something…something that had happened…that I didn’t like…or…perhaps it was something that hadn’t happened…that I wanted to…

Unfortunately…it could be…either…I have been known to whine a bit…at least in my own mind…which should be a safe place to do it…except…that…no thought is safe…from…Bertha

Anyway…Bertha…interrupted me…mid-whine…to ask…what if this was exactly what needed to happen…what if in a year I looked back on this…and laughed…because…if it hadn’t happened…or not happened…then…the most perfect thing ever…wouldn’t have happened…

Hmmm…

Then she went on to remind me…of seemingly minor things…like last week when I was running a bit late for work…and…came upon a wreck…that made me even later…that…maybe…just maybe…my running late…kept me from being involved in that wreck…

Hmmm…

From there…she was on a roll…pointing out…example after example…from my life and others…of what seemed like a bad thing at the time…turned out to be good in the realm of things…

Hmmm…I think we’ve had this conversation before…but…somehow it set differently with me this time…

It’s about…living in the moment…letting go of expectations of how things should be…and…trusting…that everything is happening…just as it should

Hmmm…I see some contemplation time in my near future…and…what if…that’s exactly as it should be…

Jane