I’ve been feeling tumultuous lately…not quite being able to settle down from
one surge of emotions…before…the next one comes crashing through…
I find that frustrating…I mean…I’ve been doing my spiritual practices…without fail…prayer…meditation…affirmation…contemplation…forgiveness…I’ve done them all…and…yet…the emotional waves keep coming…
What am I doing wrong…
Bertha…assures me…I’m doing nothing wrong…in fact…I’m doing everything right…she says during times of growth…that strong emotions will surface…be exposed for work and healing…but once they are healed…the next wave is ready to peak…
She says…that without the practices that I do…I wouldn’t be seeing a series of waves…that it would be more like a tsunami…
I hadn’t thought of it in those terms…hadn’t thought of this as a time of rapid growth…I remember now…thinking this summer would be a time of learning and growth…I embraced that…I welcomed it…
Be careful what you ask for…Bertha…chides…
And…she’s right…I have gotten exactly what I had asked for…just not the way I thought it would be…I thought it would be the equivalent of sitting on the mountain top…not lying on the beach with the surf pounding me…
So…for autumn…I’m thinking…I’ll be more selective…smooth sailing…with gentle breezes…I think I’ve grown and learned enough for a while…
Hmmm…I wonder how that will play out…
Jane
